Nicole Christie, Director of Executive Communications at Microsoft and Friend of Simple Intentions
Transparency is a raging buzzword in the corporate world. It’s all about telling it like it is, not sugarcoating the story, sharing the whole truth. It’s sometimes half-assed or disingenuous, but as a corporate communications consultant, I appreciate the effort, especially since I’m often the one crafting the message.
Yet transparency in business is an interesting juxtaposition to how we tell our personal stories—namely on social media, where painstaking effort is made to share the highlights, shape the narrative, and filter the photos. No wonder so many of us feel we pale in comparison to what we see online. No one’s sharing the whole truth—the dirty, depressing, ugly side of life.
And don’t we need to hear that?
We all have some level of discord—and dysfunction—in our lives. And when we don’t share this with each other, we feel isolated. Whether we’re sparring with a spouse, miserable in our jobs, questioning our life decisions, feeling disenchanted with the well-touted “wonders” of pregnancy and parenthood, we all experience dissatisfaction and disillusion. And while no one wants to be an online Debbie Downer, if we don’t share the shit, we aren’t truly connecting with anyone.
Mother Teresa said, “Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.” So let’s all lose the filter. Let’s share our messy homes, messy lives, messy brains—not to complain, but to connect. Show us your unshowered, unkempt self, working from home and wondering if you’ve become a social misfit after 11 years of this arrangement (hand raised). Show us not your shiny, happy, well-dressed baby, but the one who’s red-faced, wet-eyelashed, and finally asleep after an epic wail-a-thon. Show us the downside of the perfect job we all think you have, whether that’s boredom, volatility, or all-out stress.
This is transparency.
This is truth.
This is vulnerability—and there’s strength in being real. Or as Brene Brown reminds us, “Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they are never weakness.”